Heathfield Boars trip to Forges Les Eaux 2007
20 brave souls (16 players and 4 laydees) rose at 4.30 am to ensure that they made the Newhaven ferry port for 6 am. By 7.30 am the drinkers were drinking and the poker players were pokering so it could be said that the real tour to Heathfield’s twin town had started.
Gentle drinking and ribaldry ensued throughout the day interspersed with putting bags in accommodation (nice chateau for lads and cheap hotel for couples) and sorting out some late lunch (“where is the donkey meat? I want donkey meat!” quoth Mike Fellows). Forges Les Eaux is a very pleasant spot with more of a ‘central core’ than Heathfield.
The field of battle was found to be very near the accommodation and all seemed well and very picturesque.
A fine evening entertainment followed with Tony Rose bellowing “Ladies and gentlemen! Your attention please!” at regular intervals. To successfully assume the mantle of Boars manager next year he will have to make some intelligible comments immediately after gaining that attention. We also learned that Mike Fellows may have to learn to speak when drunk to have any future as an after dinner speaker. A bit of senior player and manager petulance had the lads heading to bed around midnight satisfied that 16 ½ hours drinking was enough if rugby heads were to be found the next day.
Sunshine on the day of a tournoi (yes the French spell it differently to us) is very welcome so breakfast; a wander round town and the buying of ‘le picnic’ set us up for the opening of the tournament. This being France it started late and without much ceremony.
What shall we do for the first game of the tournament? I know lets see how Les Anglais get on against the fancied French side from Paris.
Paris Vert 2 – Boars 1
The outcome was a hard game played in a bad tempered fashion by the French (sorry we later found out that is typical of French rugby!). Hard forward play was matched by good back play as both teams attempted to lay down a platform to dominate from. Paris scored first but the Boars fought back with a good break from Brady who sprinted 20 metres to score. The first half measured 15 minutes and ended even.
The second half continued in the same vein as the first with hard forward play being ignored by Brady (come on! you forwards need to get to the breakdown quicker) and hard graft in the back line (cries of “he’s yours”?) wound the clock down. Sadly a couple of illegal actions cost us our scrum half (Ben “Dover” Taylor) as a French forward experimented with the sheering point of human tissue by pulling Ben’s arm out of its socket. The game restarted and 15 minutes of the second half passed with the young Paris side (did I mention that we were the only veterans only side in the veterans tournament?) starting to edge the game. French justice was served when the French referee ignored a blatant ‘knock on’ by Paris. He then immediately allowed a penalty (fairly awarded I must say) to be taken quickly from the wrong spot behind him and a tired Boars defence failed to stop the charge over the last 5 metres. The final whistle was heard shortly afterwards (quelle surprise!). The ambulance took Ben to hospital (thank you Claire and Jo for going with him) and the team muttered as they watched a lumpy Rouen team beat the hosts Forges Les Eaux.
Rouen 1 – Boars 0
This was a bit of a battle with the Rouen forwards very happy to punch, hack and gouge at every opportunity. Captain Kenny’s eye and Jim Cumming’s nose were the most visible sins of the punishment. It was a tough game all round and the teams were well matched in most areas of the contest.
The decisive moment of the match came when the Boars defence was breached early in the second half by sheer irresistible force as the French pack mauled over the line.
The ringside referees also scored the fight card to the French but awarded Mike MacLeod high marks for artistic merit in his abuse of the French in general during the match.
Forges Les Eaux 2 – Boars 6
The bruised and battle weary Boars elected to applaud their twin town team onto the pitch and were rewarded by a clean and open match played without any boxing or WWF sideshows.
Forges showed plenty of spirit after their own two defeats as they tried to take the game to the Boars. However Jim ‘Streaky’ Cumming decided that his broken nose would not stop him having fun and he broke the Forges line on half way and strode through several tackles to the line and the first score.
That settled the Brits down and Burdett put the Boars two up after some good work from Captain Kenny Lewis who took a quick tap penalty and sucked in two defenders before offloading to Brady for the score. This led to a brief word of praise from Burdett which Lewis will treasure up their with his semi final appearance for the first team.
This was followed shortly afterwards by a score from Le Barbeur who capitalised on good work between Burdett and Simon Walker (doing well in an unfamiliar wing role) to score in the right hand corner.
Forges hit back with a well worked move that ended with their right winger going over to score. There followed one of the decisive moments of the match. Forges had their tails up and were spinning the ball wide to use their fast wingers. This led to another line break and the ball carrier sprinted to the line for a certain score. 14 Boars stood and watched getting ready for the restart kick. What was the 15 player doing? That would be Streaky Cumming running after the Forges man, catching up just over the line and knocking the ball from his hand just before he touched down. 3-2 would have given Forges a lot of hope but instead the Boars managed to survive then rub salt in the wounds as they went up the other end and guest player Levitt Williams got on the end of a move started by the forwards who pulled in lots of defenders before releasing to the backs to go wide and score.
Forges came back with another breakaway try before the Boars sealed the game with two tries (from Jim ‘Hero’ Cumming and Levitt Williams).
This ended the tournament on a very positive note (even the Forges team expressed satisfaction at being beaten rather than just being beaten up) and allowed the festivities to commence.
The party went on well into the night with many jerseys’s being swapped with revellers of both genders. Some might say that swapping trousers and underpants was going too far but luckily Captain Kenny Lewis would not agree. It must be wondered how it felt collecting the tournament ‘Fair Play award’ after that little incident as the French trousers were rather tighter than those exchanged.
A large amount of ‘friendship fluid’ was consumed and the bond between Forges les Eaux and Heathfield was tightened. “Merci Mon Ami!” and “see you next year” were frequently heard comments. The songs and dancing continued and many friendships were made.
As a final indication that the trip was worthwhile Forges Les Eaux RFC agreed to visit Heathfield in May 2008.
The Boars squad was
Mike ‘Snakehips’ Fellows, Mike ‘The Guga’ MacLeod, Simon ‘Camchar’ Walker, Tony ‘Too Tall’ Rose, John ‘Action Man’ Parsons, Jason ‘Jizzer’ Taylor, ‘Captain’ Kenny Lewis, Jim ‘Streaky’ Cumming, Ben ‘Dover’ Taylor, Brady ‘Can’t Tackle Won’t Tackle’ Burdett, Adam ‘Crash’ Farrell, Levitt ‘Bosher’ Williams, Simon ‘Twinkle Toes’ Hollingdale, Keith ‘Cunning’ Davies, Mike ‘Le Barbeur’ Barber, Gavin ‘Names’ Robinson
Camp followers were
Jo ‘The Grumpy Goblin’ MacLeod, Kay ‘Lingers’ Davies, Jo ‘Jo La Taxi’ Lewis and Claire ‘Clarence’ Burdett,
Report by Mike MacLeod
The Boars
5/31/2007 12:32:49 PM (GMT Daylight Time, UTC+01:00) 
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