Tunbridge or Tonbridge we beat them all, although Tonbridge was more of a bugger to get in and out of. After last week, it was slightly cooler but the ground was still solid even after the downpour of the previous day. The game was held on TJ’s furthest pitch – so far in fact that we were almost back in Tunbridge. This time the game was played with two halves. We had lost the Skinners’ boys who had played the day before but we had a couple of new players that I didn’t recognise. Unfortunately George M has joined Kenzie and Tom T by wearing a blue scrum cap (hence the Smurph nickname), so although I am pretty sure he made some good powerful forward runs I was never quite sure.

TJ kicked off and came forward. There was some good solid tackling from Heathfield. They were also quick into the breakdown and were more than matching TJ. Suddenly Tom T managed to get through and over the line but the referee spotted a knock on and called it back. The tide seemed to turn and TJ began dominating. They had an attacking line-out but George H stole the ball. TJ had another line-out which they won. The ball was edged closer and closer to the line and the TJ scrum half with a flick of his hips stepped inside and scored under the posts. Try converted. (7-0)

From the kick off, TJ ran and ran and ran with the ball with some poor missed tackles from Heathfield but they were eventually pushed out of play. Heathfield move onwards but TJ were strong and quick at the rucks. TJ kicked over the back line to Toby W, who almost repeated his feat of last week but only got to the 10m line. From the line-out TJ were straight back up to H 10m line. Good defence from H kept them at bay.

It was all becoming a bit frantic. TJ came close again but knocked on at the crucial moment. George H continued to disrupt the TJ line-out but without gaining the ball. There was too much kicking to nowhere from Heathfield and mistakes were starting to creep in. There was massive pressure from TJ as they piled forward. This was only going to end one way. Suddenly Sam intercepted a wayward TJ pass and from his own 10m line ran in to score under the posts. Sean made no mistake with the conversion with the last kick of the half. (7-7)

Honours were even although nobody knew how.

Half Time (7-7) 1 try, 1 conversion

Heathfield kicked off and the ball was caught brilliantly by Ryan “Darth” Vator. TJ where then penalised for not rolling away. Sean’s penalty kick to touch resulted in Heathfield winning the line-out and having possession in the opposition 22. They got close a couple of times. Sean had an opportunity and could have passed for the ball out for the overlap. The ball was retained and finally Felix found some space and bludgeoned his way across the line. Sean easily converted – well it looked easy. (7-14)

Fraser then threw on the young guns. Were they going down in a blaze of glory? Actually no they were bloody good and they more than a match for TJ especially the marauding Harrison.

TJ were now rattled and from the kick off the ball went straight out of play. I had joked the previous week that it would be carnage against TJ. Then the inevitable happened. Ryan failed to get up having pulled his hamstring. There was also a TJ badly winded lying on the ground not far away. Having helped Ryan off the pitch and the game restarted there was the sight of a motionless Gibbo lying face down on the pitch. He was slowly scraped up and helped off the pitch and made a partial recovery but the next few days will tell if he is ok.

By this time TJ were on top. They made a few breaks but only got as far as the two Tobys. George “don’t make me angry you won’t like me when I’m angry” H continued to disrupt the line-outs and had one of TJ players jostle him. This was a red rag to a bull and moments later George grabbed a ball from the back of the ruck and sped down the wing and looked for all world like he would score. Even Ed N would have struggled to keep up! Of course it could have been Ben, who looks similar and I was standing on the far side of the pitch. Unfortunately he was caught on the 22yd line but he managed to offload to Toby W. Toby was tap tackled but Heathfield maintained possession of the ball. It looked like the chance was over but with the ball being passed to Tom T who then blasted through to score. Sean converted from the angle (12-21)

TJ came back into the game and pressed forward but they were held in check time and again by the youngsters. TJ were getting frustrated and resorted to berating their own referee. Soon it was all over and Heathfield had more than held on for a famous victory.

Full Time (12-21) 3 tries, 3 conversions - Try scorers Sam, Tom T & Felix. Sean conversions (3 from 3)

It was good to see everyone getting at least half game, except Gibbo, who had about 10 minutes before being dumped on the ground. Hopefully he will make a swift recovery. I would say more about some of the hidden individuals but you were hidden in the hustle and bustle of the game. I will keep an eye out.

Remember we are gentleman playing a ruffian’s game. Sue will be bringing some soap and water along to the next game so that we can wash some mouths out.